Monogamy n. the system of being married to only one person at a time.
A facebook comment from a friend made me think, what is it about monogamy that we all want from our partners but do not wish to practice ourselves? Some of you may not agree with me and think to yourself that you wish to/would practice and in return receive monogamy with that right person. But the truth is, it takes two to tango, and c’mon, how many times have we not been in a situation where we have been tempted to look at and crave for that hot passer-by even when we were happily committed to someone!!
According to a study by Sean Collinson, 60% men and about 52% women cheat on their partners and a whopping 74% men and 68% women say they would have an affair if they knew they would never get caught. Now, going by the definition from the dictionary above, is it alright to be married to only one person and have numerous sexual partners outside, does that still enable us to term ourselves monogamous? And here, our modern day dictionary added another line to the meaning - The practice or condition of having a single sexual partner during a period of time. So, the question arises here is, can I be sexually monogamous to my partner ‘during a period of time’ and be emotionally/mentally dependent on someone else, do I still get to term myself monogamous? What about sharing all our joys and sorrows with the one we love?? I'd never want my partner to seek any support outside when I'm there to provide for it. And even if we are completely monogamous to our partners, how long will this go on do you think,realistically?
Again, ignoring all my negative comments above against the widely accepted way of living and rather having chosen to remain faithful to our relationship which society feels is the right way of living, are we happy? I mean, isn’t choosing that path supposed to work for our best and make us content/happy(overall), so are we happy of having chosen to live that way?
I think that maybe it is time we get a bit more realistic in our perspective and embrace the fact that monogamy doesn't exist (barring a very few exceptional, short lived romances and my-friend's-friend stories) and that we can stop living the lie. Or maybe, since I am not a believer of the concept of an open relationship, could it be the best way to put an end to this discussion by declaring that we will not take the society’s one-size-fits-all approach and whatever it is that we choose or amend over time, we bring transparency and communication in our relationships. Because at the end, all that matters is how we make it work, isn't it?
